arse n. What you sit on; very close in meaning to the American ass. Although ours is pure in that it doesn’t mean donkey or mule, ya silly yanks.

aye expl. Yes. Said twice in succession by pirates or poofs pretending to be pirates.

bender n. A big drinking session. Not a poof. Which is what is commonly believed. Although some Americanised twats have started using it as a term for homosexuality.

bint n. A really dumb slapper. See slapper.

biscuit n. What we ENGLISH call a biscuit, yanks call a cookie.

blimey expl. A nice mild expletive, blimey is on par with "Radical" or "Awesome". But harder.

bloke n. A male human being. Usually a geezer. See geezer.

bog n. A shitter. A toilet. A piss-pot.

bollocks n. Testicles. Usually said in disagreement to something. Like i'd say "Bollocks" to America. I.e. "You are talking bollox"

Bugger n. Used in many different ways. "Bugger me" would be like Fu*k me! "He buggered him" He had anal sex with him. "he swears to buggery!" He swears alot.

camp adj. Nothing to do with CS. A camp person (or camper?) is a poof...a real obvious one. I refer you to Elton John, West-life and the backstreet boys for more research.

Chips n. In superior England these are cooked up slices of potato. Crisps are foil wrapped snacks that come in flavours such as salt & vinegar, ready salted and cheese & onion. Not the other way round u dingle yankee doddle dandys.

Dog's Bollocks adj. Something that is brilliant. Not to be confused with Bollocks which is used in different context. See also Mutt's Nutts.

faggot n. In good ol' England, a faggot is a large meatball. Not a poof. We don't eat queers in gravy over here. Not that much anyway.

fanny n. A women's squelchy bits. Not an "ass". Ya donkeys.

football n. You yanks call our beautiful game SOCCER. Ya smelly nutsacks, call your own game soccer coz it's hardly FOOTball is it? Ya pick up the ball and run about with it...yanks. Tut.

mobile phone n. A Cell Phone in your silly altered language u stole off us.

muppet n. Ask Jason Gaunt.

nob n. Always and stupidly mispelled "knob". Which is wrong. Anyway it's a dick. A penis.

nonce n. Very much like twat, except it is not used as a desription of womens genetalia, it is very much just an insult "you fuc*in nonce".

Pissed adj. Drunk. Not angry. So don't say "WTF!!11 NOW IM PISSED!!111" when u die.

ponce n. A man who usually has long hair, designer clothers, a flash mobile phone (and uses it as often as he can. Loudly) and usually has, for some weird reason, the best looking girl sucking his dick at night. Most likely a closet poofter who has to pretend to be straight because he still lives with his mom.

poof n. A poof. Homosexual. Arse Cowboy. Sausage Jockey.

Posh adj. "She is dead posh" would mean "She is really upper-class"

prick n. An proper full blooded English word for penis. Also used as a put down "look at that soft prick"

scrubber n. Homeless person. Usually addicted to crack. Wears clothes from 2 centuries ago such as shell suits, "spliffy" jackets and jeans with cartoon faces on the knees. Wears glasses.

shag v. Sexual intercourse. Although a peck on the cheek can constitute a shag. Fuck it, boast a little, say u went all the way. Next time the "coach" tells you to "shag some balls", think of our meaning for the word. (Someone in America told me to write this...I’ve never heard the phrase "Shag some balls" before.) buh?

slapper n. Usually blonde, usually overweight. They'll shag anything. The difference between a slapper and a bitch is a slapper will shag anyone, but a bitch will shag ayone but you.

spunk n. Hot Wad. Cum. Dick Juice. Man Cocktail. Jizzum. Semen. White lava

twat adj., n. Ambiguous this one. It can mean the fishy fleshy bit of a woman. It can be used as a term for hitting someone. Or it can be used as a general all round insult, mainly to blokes. "This twat said I’d been near his woman's twat so I twatted him."

wanker n. Wank is the most common slang word for masterbate. Beating the Bishop, Pulling ya Plonker, Tossing, Jerking, Jacking, Chuffing, Playing with Madam Palm and her five loverly daughters, Hamshank, rubbing the vainy love tree. These are just other forms of saying mastbation.

yank n., adj. A big fat elastic topped jean wearing big massive fat bloke who cant talk normal, he has to shout. Usually wearing a bright Hawaiian shirt and holding some kind of food (usually hamburgers). Basically you’re every day American. The kind that have to take a wall down in their house when they want to go outside.